Handle With Care

There's a show on VH1 called "Tough Love." When the show originally aired, the premise was about matchmaker Steve Ward whipping naive single ladies into gear in his Tough Love "boot camp." Recently, VH1 has made an edition of Tough Love tailored specifically for couples who are on the brink of separation and need to make a decision to either work out their problems or to call it quits. Within minutes of watching the show, it doesn't take long to see how broken these individuals are and how much you can hurt someone's heart.

On the couples' version of the television show, there was one couple in particular where the guy had been seeing someone else while he and his girlfriend were taking a break. However, he kept this from her and would harp on her for the text messages she would receive on her phone from other men when they got back together. Not only this, but he had a ton of other women's phone numbers and he stayed in contact with some of these women throughout the duration of their time together.

Once Steve Ward got to the bottom of this, the truth came out and he had no choice but to come forward about the girl that he was seeing. You could witness all of the hurt coming out of his girlfriend's face. For eight years, she gave him her life and he chose to thank her by having his cake and eating it, that is until Steve shoved it in his face by forcing the two to take a break. Needless to say, the young woman absolutely agreed with Steve's decision.

There is probably nothing more fragile, and at times, more calloused than the human heart. It takes a lot to give another person access to your heart, especially someone who you are just getting to know. Sometimes that individual mishandles it and then you are reticent towards trusting them or any other person for that matter. They forget to handle with care and instantly an alarm goes off that warns you of ever trusting that person again.

My pastor once put it to me this way: The heart is like a flower. The more you treat it with love and respect, the more it's going to blossom. However, if you bombard that flower with abuse, disapproval, and selfishness, that flower is going to wilt. You have to handle it with care because once you mistreat it, it going to be difficult for that heart to let you back in.

This isn't restricted to dating relationships, however. Sometimes, the original place warzone for the heart is at home, and many have "purple hearts." Although they try to convince you otherwise, parents are not infallible and often times they are still trying to heal from wounds that their parents gave them. Sometimes children receive harsh treatment that's seeded in those dark pasts. It's a generational curse and the only thing that can fix it is the peace and joy that could only result from Godly love. Matters are only made worse when children do not see this type of love exhibited in the home. It makes them feel less secure in themselves and is often the root to why they misbehave.

The point here is that you have to be constantly mindful about the impact that you could be making on someone's soul. In case you didn't know, the heart is where the soul is. It's the center of who you are. It's were emotions originate and cognition takes place. If you lay decay where someone's life-force is, obviously they will wilt. Place termites into a vase of flowers and see that they won't dispose of them. However, if you want to see others thrive, be a light that generates the process of human photosynthesis and watch that person grow.

During the couple's forced break, both had a glimpse of what life would be like without each other. The girlfriend enjoyed the time apart and it put her in a better headspace. The boyfriend was devastated. He felt really bad about what he done and he wanted to make it right. Fortunately for him, she was willing to let him back end after the show stopped filming. Fortunately for him, she did not cement her heart closed. During the end of the season special, he proposed to her, and as of now, they will be getting married.

Have you ever received a package from UPS or FedEx and writings on the box warn you to handle the parcel with care? Although the human heart doesn't come with instructions, you still have to treat it like the tender component that it is. Handle with care.